Another Week Off
Some people have come up to the street and say "Is Koy a chump? Why is he taking another week off? What's the dealio with him, man?". I always just kinda smirk because I know exactly why Koy isn't playing this week. You see, the real reason Koy isn't playing is because he is just too damn cool. Andy Reid was begging Koy to play against the Cowboys. He was on his knees begging. But Koy just said "Look, I want another week to party hardy and get all crazy, just tell everybody my arm isn't healed yet". Of course, Andy is a chump so he started crying but Koy didn't budge. This is his time off and his time to part-ay.
So, what are his plans for his week off? That's a good question, I got it all mapped out for you here:
Monday: Go to Cancun, Mexico with one thing on his mind: party. He'll get all the ladies down there once they realize who he is. He'll just spend the whole day drinking with the hordes of ladies until he just passes out (and that takes a while because Koy can hold his alcohol with the best of them).
Tuesday: Go to the Bahamas with one mission: party hardy. He won't have a hangover from Monday's Cancun trip because he's Koy Detmer and Koy simply does not get hangovers. So he'll down like 72 shots in an hour and then go out and grab some ladies to take back to his little hut he owns in the Bahamas. Once again he will just spend the whole night partying like an animal until he passes out.
Wednesday: Playboy Mansion trip with three objective: party, party and party. All the Playboy bunnies will ignore the other celebrities and flock over to the bearded one, Koy Detmer. He'll probably be so drunk that he'll end up sleeping with a house plant or something but he doesn't even care.
Thursday: Maybe roll into practice after pounding 80 beers. Maybe hold a few kicks and then vomit on AJ Feeley then leave. At night he will probably go to some crazy island that we haven't even heard of because only the biggest celebrities know of it. He'll probably sleep with dozens of big name female celebrities but be too drunk to even know who it is and why they are famous, he's crazy like that.
Friday: Fly to Germany on his private jet to go to one of those crazy German parties. He probably won't like it and then he'll just leave the party with some ladies and take them back to his jet for a little private time.
Saturday: Game time.